A Memorial for My Children
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Douglas Randolph *Randy* |  |
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Born |
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| Tracy Michelle *Tracy* | ||
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Born |
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| Marc Christopher *Chris* | ||
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Born |
Please click on my children's name to learn more about them.
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This is dedicated to my three children, Randy, Tracy and Chris, who were murdered by their own father ten years ago. And to all of the children that have lost their lives by the hands of a parent, a relative, friend or stranger, I am so sorry for what you had to go through. I saw... I know... I found your little bodies.
To the loved ones that are left behind and have to live
each day with the pain of the lost of their child/children,
This has touched the souls and the hearts of many people.
The spirits of every member of my family have been crushed. Their lives will never be the same. Our friends are different,the teacher's at school are even changed people.
Our church family and pastor have changed.
No one can come out of domestic violence like this and
expect to be normal again.
How can one not be touched by the loss of a child's
life, especially when it is such a senseless loss? But
isn't the murder of any child senseless? I grieve everyday
for the life for my babies and will for the rest of my life.
I wonder what my sons would look like now? I will never
see them in college or be the mother of the "grooms".
My beautiful daughter should be learning to drive a
car and going to high school dances. I will never have any
grandchildren or know the joy of holding, kissing and
spoiling them!
I never got to say "goodbye" to them ! But how does a mother or father ever say goodbye to their child?
How can we as "parents", as "people", stop this from happening to the most precious gift that God has given us ? Our babies, our own flesh and blood dying because they get caught in the middle of Domestic Disputes, that turn into violence ! Didn't God give us these little ones to love and protect? Not to abuse and mistreat and certainly not to murder them. When will this ever stop ? When will we ever learn what real love is? When will the pain ever go away?
Children are given
They are created from love
To be nurtured and directed
From the earth and above
The rarest of gifts
This Minstrel can show
Is to all of the others
What parents do know
The waking smiles
And pleasing way
That children can brighten
Your life and your day
So with these small tokens
Of words and of rhyme
It's in the growth of a child
We should all make the time
Poem by The Minstrel Copyright © 1996
Do not avoid my eyes.
Do not walk away from me.
I am a mother.
Come close, sit down
and listen.
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The Pearl
Never saying goodbye,
I return over and over
to sit on the dirt mattress
covered with the bright green grass blanket
made from seed sewn by your grandfather.
Unlike the mother and child we once were,
you have gone without my permission,
not holding my hand,
through a door I can not open.
At the grave,
you are now the wiser one
but death will not let you
give me the answers.
And would I believe you if you said,
"The pain that has come between us
will someday be our Pearl ?"
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I Will Be Fine
You ask, "How are you doing?" and I reply,
"I'm fine."
But, inside my mind is screaming...those words are just not mine.
But, I thank you so for asking, it is difficult...I know.
As I'm sure the pain is evident...you know I love them so.
Every crevice of my being, every corner of my soul....
is filled with longing...aching, that will never cease...I know.
Yet, I know I will get better...my heart will heal with time.
It will never ever be whole again, but...yes, I will be fine.
The pain will dull as time goes by with the help from God above...
We have so much in common...He has the ones I love.
My faith in Him sustains me for He does so much you see
He sends their love down to me...it surrounds me endlessly.
Someday we will be reunited, in the Heavens up above
Someday God will rejoin me with the children that I love.
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The laughter of angels can heal a broken heart.
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The first mad anguish fades to heavy sorrow and after a long while into
a soft weakness of tears that can be blinked away before anyone sees.
But not always.
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Don't be dismayed at good-byes.
A farewell is necessary before you can meet again.
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And meeting again, after moments or lifetimes,
is certain for those who are family and friends.
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Email Katie
Jewels and Gems
Randy | Chris
Tracy
*Note* Many have asked me what happened to my husband.
He also died that day....he took his own life as well.